First Think, Then Pray
NOTE: Several months ago I began a series on the Prayers of St. Paul. That work led me to write a short book about learning to pray as the first century church prayed. Beginning with this post I will be posting excerpts from the book. You may EMAIL office@christumc.us if you are interested in receiving a copy of the book.Misdirected Prayer Requests
Many of the prayers in the church today are contrary to Biblical models. Let’s look at some of the common misdirected prayer requests circulating within our churches.
If someone loses their job we may be asked to pray that they will find work. That’s good. But it’s not enough. There may be something God would have us to do to bring help or comfort to the situation, but how often do we seek God’s guidance on how we can help? I’ll go further on this point below.
What about the prayer request to have a better work environment? God has called His people to be a light to the world. An unpleasant work environment may be the place God needs us the most. Instead of praying to move we can pray for strength to be a faithful witness. Again, I’ll go further on this point below.
Each Individual Is Important To God
The Bible affirms that each individual is important to God. Often we hear someone say they have confidence their prayers will be answered because so many people were praying with them. Sometimes people will mention that through the internet they are connected to prayer chains around the world. Where in the Bible are we taught that if more people are praying there is a greater likelihood God will answer our prayers? It’s not there. Yet many times someone will try to get all their friends to pray in agreement with them in the belief it makes a difference whether or when God answers their prayers. If that were true, what would that say about the character of God? It would suggest that God plays favorites and responds first to the person who has the most friends praying with them. The Bible teaches God does not show favoritism. (See Acts 10:34 and Romans 2:11)
NOTE: The issue I am addressing is our individual prayers. The Bible does refer to the prayers of the saints and to when the people of God are praying. That context refers to the church being united in prayer for issues relating to the mission of the church.
Often I hear people say that they have been strengthened by people praying for them. I have no doubt that is true. Certainly we are encouraged when we know that we are not alone and that many people are supporting us through a particularly trying time. But, God’s is for us. God working in us through the circumstance we are experiencing is not increased because many people pray. God’s responds whether one prays or one thousand. In fact, the Apostle Paul says in Romans 8 that there are times when we do not know how to pray, yet the Holy Spirit intercedes and prays for us, perfectly according to God’s will. To think we need a lot of people praying for us in order for God to answer our prayers is to take the power of prayer off of God and put it onto the people praying. That’s not what we want to do.
Praying Certain Words
Another suggested prayer method is learning to pray scripture or quote promises of God in your prayers. Again, you are hard pressed to find any example of this in the New Testament. It is a very good thing to know scripture and allow scripture to influence the things for which we pray. (Remember it was scripture that empowered Jesus to resist the temptations of the devil after his forty days in the desert.) It is also a very good thing to know about the promises of God. But, no where is it suggested in the Bible that we somehow gain greater access to God by praying certain words. This is much like the fable that God helps those who help themselves. That, of course, is the exact opposite of what the Bible says. Jesus said blessed are the meek because they know apart from God’s grace there is no hope for them. (Matthew 5:3)
Praying For Healing
One of the most common prayer requests is for healing. It is good to pray for healing, even though we do not understand why on some occasions we believe people are healed by God and on others we see no evidence of healings. The fact that we do not understand should not prevent us from praying. We do not need to try and explain why we may not see the results we are hoping for. Some things will remain a mystery.
In our prayers for healing we need to remember that our illnesses come from two basic sources. First, illnesses are a natural part of our mortal life. Our bodies wear out. Secondly, illnesses are cause and effect. Examples of this run from the sublime to the ridiculous. As an example, my son came to me and asked for prayer because he was concerned about his high cholesterol. High cholesterol can be the result of genetics but most often it is a result of being over weight and what we eat. I asked my son had he considered changing his diet from biscuits and gravy for breakfast and McDonald’s hamburgers for lunch. Certainly we want to pray for healing in our own lives as well as to intercede for healing in the lives of others. We also want to learn to take responsibility for the decisions we make. Sometimes we are able to take corrective action and participate in our own healing, or as in the example above, suggest corrective action to others.
Other examples are more sublime. I recall being in a hospital room when a person in their mid-forties died from lung cancer. A grieving relative kept asking, “Why?” Their question was not so much why the person had cancer as they knew the person had smoked over a pack a day for more than thirty years. But, the person was a Christian. They had prayed for healing and were not satisfied by the notion that the person had experienced the ‘ultimate healing’ of being taken up to heaven.
The healings of Jesus in the Gospels were proof that He was the Son of God and also examples of what life is like in the Kingdom of God when sin and evil have been ultimately defeated. As for now, we live in a world where sin and evil are all around us. God has planted the church in the midst of the world to be a lighthouse. Through our faith in Jesus we have salvation which is liberation from the guilt and fear and power of sin. Because of what Christ has done for us we get to live in the presence of God, for all eternity, without shame. This, I believe is both healing and comfort from God and it is this reality that we are called by God to witness to the world.
Of course there are other examples even more troubling, such as cases where the illness is not the result of anything we have done or where we are the victims of tragic accidents not of our own making.
Often in our prayers for healing we are faced with the classic conundrum. If our prayers are not answered does that mean?
A- God could have answered my prayer, but choose not to; or
B- That God lacks the power to answer my prayer.
Let’s address option B first. Paul writes in Ephesians 1: 19-20,
“I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms.”
God having the power to intervene in our circumstances is not the issue.
As for option A, Paul writes in Romans 5: 8 & 11:
“But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.”
Our relationship with God has been established by the faithfulness of Jesus. Every action God takes is motivated by His great love for us. Some people like to say that God answers all of our prayers and sometimes the answer is no (or not yet.) I am troubled by that saying because it can create the inference that God could have done something for me, but choose not to. I would rather say, God always answers our prayers and His answers are always expressions of His unfailing love for us. The promise of God is that God is using every circumstance in our lives for his good purpose of transforming us to become like Christ. (Romans 8:28-29) Although it may take us a good deal of time to understand how God is using certain circumstances for good in our lives; never-the-less, God is at work in us.
Our circumstances may be different, but the reality of God’s love is unchanging. Our prayers for healing may not result in the circumstances being changed, but I do believe our prayers to receive God’s comfort are answered.
Praying About Money
Another common prayer request is about money. Not surprisingly, this is the topic that Jesus taught about the most. However, most of the prayer requests about money are misdirected because they simply want the problem to go away.
Like most people, I have had family members struggle with their finances. Sometimes the problem is caused by adverse circumstances such as the loss of a job or a medical crisis. Most of the time, however, the financial problems are caused by bad decisions. In the course of my ministry several members of my congregations have faced financial crises and some have filed for bankruptcy. To the best of my knowledge, none of the families that applied the teachings of Jesus to their personal finances experienced these issues. Those who controlled their personal financial practices by making disciplined, regular giving to the church their number one priority have been able to handle all of their finances with Godly wisdom.
Certainly we have empathy and compassion for those in financial distress; however, our prayer requests should go beyond asking for relief from the crisis. Our prayers can be for wisdom to learn from our mistakes and for a willingness to direct our whole life to God, which includes learning and practicing Godly principals in our personal finances.
Prayers for Protection
Another frequent prayer request is for traveling mercies or a hedge of protection around someone who may be traveling or going into a risky situation. It is good to pray for protection; however, have you considered there is a higher purpose for which you can pray? Even a cursory reading of the New Testament or early church history reveals that the followers of Jesus experienced much physical injury through their travels and ministries. They were ship wrecked, beaten, jailed, exiled and martyred.
Do you remember the Apostle Paul’s conversion experience? He encountered Jesus face to face. Later, God gave him the revelation that was the basis for his gospel of grace. If anyone was close to the heart of God and could have benefited from these types of prayers it was Paul. Yet, he experienced accidents at sea and suffered brutal assaults inflicted by his enemies.
Once, when he was in jail he had an opportunity to communicate a prayer request to his friends. His request was not to change his circumstances; it was for encouragement so that he would boldly proclaim the gospel while in jail. (Colossians 4: 2-4)
On another occasion Paul knew he was journeying into harms’ way and he asked the church to intercede for him in prayer. (Romans 16) The journey resulted in Paul being jailed for two years. Then he was shipwrecked traveling to Rome where he spent the rest of his life in jail. His prayer request was not that he would be spared from experiencing these adverse circumstances. Rather, he wanted to be strong in the Lord so that he could boldly proclaim the Gospel despite his circumstances.
Intercessory Prayers & Prayers in a Crisis
What is the first thing most Christians do when faced with a crisis? Pray. And ask others to pray for them. The same is true when you learn of a friend in a crisis. You pray and ask others to join you.
This is not the wrong thing to do, if your prayer is asking God for wisdom on how you can respond to the crisis.
If you are in a crisis then you can pray and seek God’s guidance on how to respond to your circumstances. If you have a friend or family member in a crisis then your prayer can be for wisdom on how you can be a help and a comfort to your friend.
Unfortunately, most prayers in these situations simply tell God about the circumstances and ask God to change the circumstances. These prayers are often about pain avoidance rather than how the person can experience God working all things together for the good of transforming their life to become like Jesus.
The problem is when we are praying for God to change the circumstances we are in effect trying to put the ball in God’s court and then sitting down. The expectation is that God is going to fix things. If it is your crisis, then you may be avoiding taking responsibility for your life. If it is your friend’s crisis you may be avoiding taking responsibility to help. Yes, responsibility to help. God’s command that we love our neighbors as we love ourselves means that we are willing to invest ourselves into the lives of our neighbors. In addition to praying for someone, it may well be God’s will for you to do something that will bring help or comfort to them.
Love is a verb. The Bible says that Christ died for us while we were yet sinners. That proves God’s love for us. (Romans 5:8) The action God took was evidence of God’s love. So it is for us. The action we take in response to God’s leading is evidence of our love for God and love for the person for whom we are praying. Sometimes, because we are separated by time and distance, we may not be able to personally get involved in a situation. Most often, however, we can, if we choose to act in love.
Does this mean that intercessory prayer doesn’t work? If by work you mean that your prayers for another person will cause God to move in that person’s life to change their circumstances, then yes, I am saying that does not work. Would you really want God to answer those prayers? Given the choice of asking God to change a circumstance based upon my wisdom and asking for God’s will to be done, I choose trusting God’s way over my way.
In the New Testament church intercessory prayers were Kingdom related. The prayers were petitions for the individual’s life to be transformed through their crisis, and for strength to witness to their faith in Christ while in the midst of a crisis.
This principal applies to all intercessory prayers, not just prayers about a crisis situation. As an example, I remember a wedding I was officiating. The groom’s father made the statement that from the time his son was born, he and his wife had been praying for the person – the wife -- God would bring into their son’s life.
It is very good to desire a Godly spouse for your children. However, too often the prayer seems to stop by just telling God what kind of spouse you desire for your child. This raises several concerns. First, if we assume that God has chosen the perfect person as our child’s spouse we are getting into the realm of predestination. As Christians we believe God has given us free will. Yes, God knows our future, but that is because of his infinite wisdom not because he has already predetermined what choices we are going to make. Second, this way of praying falls into the category discussed above where we pray for God to do something and now that we have put the ball in God’s court we sit down. How then should we pray?
At the end of this booklet there are thirty-one prayers for Biblical virtues. (Appendix B) First, I suggest you pray these for yourself as well as for your children or others. Secondly, seek God’s wisdom on how you can teach your child to direct their whole life to God and to learn how to make Godly choices in their lives.
Can you see the difference? Instead of just praying that God send a Christian to marry our child; we pray to take responsibility for our life as a disciple of Jesus and as a parent. We seek to fulfill our responsibility to impart Godly wisdom to our children so they can learn to make wise choices for their lives.
Another example of intercessory prayer is when we pray for others to come to faith in Christ, or if they have cooled in their commitment to Christ, for their renewal of faith. Too often our concern for others in this regard stops with our prayers. Again, it is like we are putting the ball into God’s court then stepping back to see what God does. God’s will is for each of us to become instruments of grace that God can use to bring people to faith. This, of course, means that we are willing to become involved in the spiritual life of others.
One way to think about how we can be involved with others is: Make a friend; Be a friend; Lead a friend to Christ. Remember the benediction mentioned above: “Bear witness to the love of God in this world so that those to whom God is a stranger will find in you generous friends.”
Love Defined: “The will to extend one’s self for the purpose of nurturing one’s own or another’s spiritual growth.”
In summary, it is wonderful that we care enough about other people that we pray for them. However, it is even better when we seek Godly wisdom on how God can use us to bring about His purpose in the lives of others.
